We are so hard on ourselves as women—often expecting ourselves to meet everyone’s needs but our own. Or at least saving our own needs until everyone else’s are met. Which never happens.
Writing, particularly journaling, can provide a perfect antidote. You don’t need to give it much time—just a few minutes in the morning, a ten minute break at lunch, or twenty minutes just before bed. Your writing practice can help you get in touch with:
- How you’re feeling
- What you need
- One loving thing you can do for yourself right now
You might also try writing a love letter to yourself. Why wait for someone else to make you feel great about yourself? You know yourself better than anyone. Start with a beautiful salutation, “My dearest Lisa” or “My darling companion” or “My BFF.”
Next, tell yourself in the letter why you are writing—how you want yourself to feel. “I’m writing because you deserve to know how much you mean to me,” or “I want you to feel in love with yourself by the end of this letter—I am!”
Compliment yourself on:
- One thing that is beautiful—your legs, your smile, your eyes. If you can’t think of anything, stare into your eyes in front of the mirror with the intention of describing them in detail. Notice flecks of color in your irises, or the way the light plays on your eyes, or how deep you look.
- Something about your hands—it may be the way they look, or feel, or what they do for you, how they play the piano, or even that you can make a cool sound when you snap your fingers—you can be playful with this. And it can be something that everyone else’s hands do too!
- One funny thing about you or something funny you said.
- Something quirky about you—that you like to sing when you walk,
Tell yourself how much you appreciate the small things you do for yourself:
- “I love that you go for walks in the morning.”
- “Thank you for cooking me healthy food.”
- “Thank you for…
Offer to do something special for this person you love—maybe something daring or that pushes the envelope and feels loving and exciting:
- “I’d like to take you for a long walk on the beach tomorrow—just me, myself and I.
- “Let’s go skinny dipping tonight at the pond—alone”
Or if that’s too intimidating, just something you love to do:
- “Let’s go to the museum this weekend.”
And close with one more wish for yourself or a loving reminder:
- “I hope you enjoy every person you meet today.”
- “Have the best week ever.
- “Look in the mirror and know that I love you.”
And sign with your mushiest or most inventive closing possible.
Put your love letter in an envelope and adorn it with a pretty picture. Mail it to yourself. When you receive it, open with excitement and read it out loud. Feel the love as you read. Enjoy.
P.S. Don’t forget the P.S.
About Lisa Tener