We hear a lot about the ego nowadays. We hear how it’s bad and we should transcend it. And that we should seek enlightenment because then we’d somehow be more worthy. We receive all these messages about how if we only obliterated that pesky ego we would suddenly feel so much better.
The thing is, the ego is our friend. It’s just our mind. It’s the voice in our head. Yes, it’s known for its neurotic ramblings like, “Did I remember to turn the stove off? I can’t remember. Maybe I should go back and check… No I think I did. What if I didn’t? What would happen? Would the house burn down? Should I call my neighbor and have them check?” But the mind or ego is also responsible for all of the planning and executive function that our brain sets our body in motion to enact to create our world. It’s how we cook dinner and go to work and make an effort to be kind to our partner – because we think about it.
In many ways the ego is our friend. Cate Montana says in her book “The E Word: Ego, Enlightenment, and Other Essentials” that when most people reach true enlightenment they leave their bodies. In that case they’ve completely transcended the ego. They have no attachment to being here and they just let go and float away.
It seems to me that if we are incarnated here at this time in history and if we feel we have a purpose or we have attachments to the people we care about and we want to stay here awhile longer then we might want to make friends with our ego. Perhaps we can soothe it, calm it, and feed it what it needs to be healthy. In doing so we can form a partnership between our higher spiritual selves and our human personality self.
We are all things. I have watched for over fifteen years as a medical intuitive as people awaken to that fact. We have all been the mystic and the martyr, the tycoon and the tyrant, the servant and the sage. Who we are at this moment is an expression of a facet of our totality.
Montana says that, “Meditation is a great gateway out of the story in our heads called “me.” As you meditate, notice the brief moments where there’s a gap in the tidal wave of chatter. The more you become aware of and focus into those peaceful gaps when your mind isn’t filled with your story, thinking about your boyfriend or your job or your bills, the more you tap into the simple presence running the whole show of life, the Great Presence I call I AM.”
How can we make the ego our friend through meditation? Try the following tips to quiet your mind and balance your personality self with your spiritual self.
1) Start with a mantra. A mantra is simply a word or series of words repeated over and over while meditating. It’s a great way to focus your mind on something besides its own chatter. You can use any word you’d like for mantra. Pick something uplifting and positive. Some people like to use certain Sanskrit words. Here are some great ideas for mantras to get you started: love, joy, shanti (Sanskrit for peace), om (sanskrit for creation), ra ma da sa sa say so hung (Sanskrit for Sun, Moon, Earth, Infinity, All that is in infinity, I am Thee). Simply sit or lay down in the meditative posture and repeats your mantra focusing on its meaning. Sometimes you need to repeat it more frequently if your mind is wandering. And if your mind is clearing you can even let it fade into the background.
2) Embrace your ego with love. Understand that you are just like everyone else, trying to do the best you can in a complicated world. Sometimes you’ll make missteps. And sometimes you will experience transcendent moments of consciousness. It’s all part of the human experience. So give your ego the message that you love it. And, that you thank at for getting you from point A to point B throughout your life. This beautiful mind that you possess has been your partner in creating your life. Honor it! Using affirmations to give your mind some much needed love. Save the following three times: “I love and accept my mind in its totality. I affirm that every part of me was a born out the universal light of love. I invite harmony in my life, my mind, and my heart. I ask that all aspects of me work together for the very highest good of all life.”
Love and accept the totality of who you are and watch your life bloom. Feel your spirit relax. And allow your mind to enter the flow of divine mind via the endless river of self-love available to you.