When you’re in the midst of something really painful, maybe a huge challenge, you probably say to yourself it’s impossible for me to feel gratitude. The truth is, you can find gratitude in anything that happens If you choose to. Finding gratitude is really a spiritual practice and the key word is practice. You can take simple steps that can ensure you will feel gratitude again in your heart.
When life hits you on the head with a cosmic to 2×4, you can either wallow in your pain or you can use a simple spiritual practice to get to a place of gratitude. When I say gratitude, I am referring to finding the wisdom or the lesson in what you are currently experiencing. You can choose to embrace the will to refocus and strengthen your resolve. Ultimately, it’s a small shift in perception. Gratitude is about appreciating your self during a challenge. You recognize that you are utilizing your power of choice to empower yourself through difficult times. Gratitude does not necessarily mean that you feel thankful for someone else’s behavior, which may have been harmful. However, you can be grateful for how you held up and responded in the situation.
This year was the most difficult time I have experienced in my life. I was in the process of ending my marriage. In the whirlwind of pain and confusion, I was able to find gratitude. I had set a powerful intention on how I wanted to conduct myself through the process although it was gut wrenching. I wanted to be able to look back on it and know I did everything I could and that I did it with love. Today I am so grateful that I could look beyond my own ego and the wounds I felt so as to bring the situation to closure with grace. I did have to advocate for myself but I did it as a self-loving woman and not as some enraged betrayed and wounded soul.
In challenging times, you can choose to react or you can choose to respond. When you react you’re turning your power over to the other party and your behavior is usually heated, not well planned, and ultimately a low vibration. If you choose to respond you have taken time to think about what you want to do. You’ve prepared yourself emotionally and you are in a higher vibration. When you respond you’re staying in your feminine power. When you react your standing in your masculine energy, which is more combative and aggressive. Therefore, what you will get back is also combative and aggressive. Imagine pushing against a wall and you are pushing really, really hard. What does that feel like to your body? It’s exhausting and reacting does the exact same thing to you physically. It drains you of your good energy. It attacks you mentally and emotionally. When you’re in a lower vibration, it will be impossible to see a higher purpose to a situation and to develop gratitude which is so healing.
“Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space lies our freedom and power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and freedom.” ~ Victor Frankl
Here are three powerful but easy steps you can utilize to connect you with gratitude.
Emotional Freedom Technique.
There has been so much conversation the last few years regarding the Emotional Freedom Technique. What you do is tap on specified points on your wrist, head, face and body to shift your emotional state. I must admit I wasn’t a strong believer until I tried it and worked with the technique for several days. It is so easy to do and you script your own statements that you utilize through the process. There are several great resources to help you with this. Go to YouTube and there are thousands of videos on tapping. I particularly like this one How to Tap by Jessica Ortner. There is also the book, the Tapping Solution by Nick Ortner which is excellent and has diagrams to show you exactly how to do it.
Pull your focus inward and breathe.
When you are in the midst of a challenge, it is so easy to be consumed by what is happening. Try pulling your attention off the situation or the other person. Bring your focus inward and breathe deeply. Negative energy can build very quickly in your body. The next thing you know you are nauseous or you have a headache. When you feel that tightness building sit and do some breath of fire. It is a breath similar to a dog panting. You breathe in and out rapidly for a couple of minutes. Contracting your belly when you exhale. It clears the tension very quickly. Be grateful for your breath as you feel better. When you are in the throes of a situation your mind runs to the past or to the future with fear, anxiety and judgement. Doing this breathing practice brings you back to the present moment, where you can connect with a peaceful feeling again.
Dump your scary thoughts.
I am amazed at how quickly and effective this next practice is. I often wake up feeling gripped by something. The fear is building in my body. I take out my notebook and I start to write whatever comes into my mind. I am not concerned about spelling, grammar or even finishing sentences. I just want to get what is running through my mind out. A good ten minutes of this and your body and mind just relax. I don’t even bother to reread the material because it starts with mostly fearful thoughts that are no longer in my head. It’s interesting that towards the end of ten minutes you are writing much more self-inquiry statements. It brings you right back to a peaceful place where you can often can do a morning meditation still sitting in your bed.
If you will implement these three practices, you can build so much gratitude into your daily experience. You will experience less fear and insecurity. You will feel more positive, connected and clear. The most powerful tools you can implement are free.
So go for the GRATITUDE!
