Featured Article

Christine Hassler | Aspire Magazine |Dec17/Jan18 "Taking Time for You" Issue

Why Being a People Pleaser is Selfish

“The art of pleasing is the art of deceiving.”  ~ French Proverb Are you concerned about what other people think of you? Do you often make decisions based on what you think will please others? Does your sense of self-worth come from the approval of others? Do you often withhold from sharing what you truly want, think or feel because of fear it may upset someone? Are you often last on your list of priorities? Believe me, you are not alone. Our egos love to be liked, approved and validated.  It is natural … [Read More...]

Wisdom & Self Growth

Resolutions

Resolution

I don’t mean to brag but . . . I finished my 14-day diet in 3 hours and 12 minutes. Resolution: A firm decision to do or not to do something. “My name is Kelly and I am a resolution-making failure.” “HELLO KELLY!” Aha, good, I see I am not alone! A few years back on January 1, I gave up sugar as a New Year’s resolution. Unfortunately, on January third I was found eating a tub of Ben and Jerry’s Fish Food . . . with a side of Christmas cookies. In fairness, I did feel I needed to rid the house of all temptation—easier to do it in one fell swoop! Another January, I joined a gym with a life-time membership, pledging to go five times a week. Yes, I still have the membership; no I haven’t been there in over ten months. But this past January I figured it out. … [Read More...]

Health & Wellness

7 Signs That You’re Awakening to Life

Life

We’re in this life journey together, we’re all peers in this experience that is filled with infinite opportunities. But in today’s fast paced world it’s hard to be in the reality of the present moment - which is all we have - and very easily, we get distracted by the demands of the day to day and our culture, so we end up disconnected from our true essence.  When we live from that place, we mainly connect with a sense of contraction, fear, confusion and limitations that push us to just get by, avoid reality, feel a constant struggle, and restrict our capacity to be our own true selves, share our gifts, make love to life and embrace all the magic that it can offer to us.    I believe that we are going through a transformational time on the planet, and we are being … [Read More...]

Relationships

Why Being a People Pleaser is Selfish

Christine Hassler | Aspire Magazine |Dec17/Jan18 "Taking Time for You" Issue

“The art of pleasing is the art of deceiving.”  ~ French Proverb Are you concerned about what other people think of you? Do you often make decisions based on what you think will please others? Does your sense of self-worth come from the approval of others? Do you often withhold from sharing what you truly want, think or feel because of fear it may upset someone? Are you often last on your list of priorities? Believe me, you are not alone. Our egos love to be liked, approved and validated.  It is natural to want to fit in and not “upset others” because it feels safer. All it takes one small experience of feeling criticized, not liked, thinking we’ve upset someone, or getting tons of praise and validation for making others happy to develop people pleasing as a bad … [Read More...]

Career & Business

Waiting for the Expert Fairy

Expert

I have a confession to make. I used to really, REALLY crave approval. I wanted so badly to be recognized for being awesome at what I did, and for the contributions I made―and it hurt to the core of my soul when that didn’t happen. For me, this longing never morphed into debilitating people-pleasing behavior (unless you count going WAY over the top for my clients, which I did and still do). Nor did I ever voice my need to be recognized, or talk myself up. Instead, my longing to be valued quietly turned to resentment, bitterness, and envy. My pity party went like this: I was good at what I did, dammit. I was as good as, or better than, many of those so-called experts who were raking in all the money, stage time, and clients. So, why weren’t people seeing me? Why … [Read More...]